What do we do with a drunken Xelloss?
by Xee Metallium
Summary: uh oh.... Never keep drink in reach of small children, pets or minions... O.o Reviews are nice ^^;;


Disclaimer: I don't own them o.o I don't I don't... I am saying this of my own free will.... I'm being well looked after....   
  
Another Mazoku ficcie! Oh dear ^^   
  
"Has anyone seen my mommy?!" a voice wailed across the room. "Everytime I jump on my bed, there's a scary monster on it!"   
  
Since the moment Xelloss, trickster priest and generally irritating but mostly kawaii and genki mazoku had emerged from his room today, he'd been acting oddly to say the least. The conclusion had been reached by everyone when he'd been caught glaring suspiciously at his reflection.   
  
"I don't trust you." He growled, backing away slowly, not once letting the oddly dressed man out of sight until he was able to sidestep... then the weirdo vanished. Curious about where he went, Xelloss crept up to the door/mirror and poked his head round to look at it. The stranger did the same.   
  
"Gotta hate those cosplayers." He commented firing a random blast at the mirror and shattering it. He walked back his room, more specifically, to the bed and sat on it. "Monster!" he jumped off. "Gone now."  
  
He jumped on to the bed. "monster on the bed."  
  
Then he jumped off again. "monster gone."   
  
He jumped on it again and repeated the routine a few times. "monster on, monster gone. monster on, monster gone."  
  
Once bored... which was when he'd jumped so hard the bed had broke and was no longer bouncy, he wandered off to find everyone. His memory was fuzzy at best today, and he knew that there were a lot of higher mazoku around the place... where ever it was that it was that he was staying at the moment. While trying to make a quick sum of exactly how many mazoku that meant on his fingers.   
  
"Me, Zelash, Gaav, Phiberizzero, Dynast, Doflin, Sherra, Grau, other Grou, Rashaart, Raltark, Vallerygaav, Norst, another one, someone I forget and.... "   
Well, he walked head on into the blue haired General of Dynast's... Sherra.   
  
"Essscuse me." He spun sharply on his heel to step around her and straight into Valgaav.   
  
Sherra and Valgaav looked at eachother as the purple oddball went to a random room. They followed and peeked around the door.  
  
"Are you drunk?" Sherra asked as Xelloss leapt on to the bed and began to bounce.   
  
"Nope!" The purple mazoku replied, tripping after getting his foot tangled in Phibrizzo's bedcovers and falling with his feet in the air. "Ow."   
  
"You are." Valgaav said. "Very drunk."  
  
"Being drunk means I have to drink. I only drank nothing but the black wine today.... so I'm not drunk. Beacuse that's all I drunk." His feet were still in the air and the ceiling was spinning just a tiny bit. It looked odd.  
  
"Oooooooookay." Valgaav shook his head.   
  
"Drunk as a ... Zelas." Sherra commented with a smirk.   
  
"I'm not drunk." The indignant upside down mazoku cut in. "I'm Drunks name I am not Lord Ruby-eye!"  
  
"Damn straight you're not." Valgaav replied.  
  
"I'm not think like you drunk I am! Just... umm... In... in... in..." That word began with 'in' , he knew it! "In.... interested!"  
  
"Interested in what though?" Sherra raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Hmm...." Now was when Xelloss decided to right himself and look at the rather nice looking green dragon type guy and the slightly less nice looking blue haired bimbo. "Interested... no... wrong word. Int... Int.... Intercour..."  
  
"How dare you mention such things in the presence of my young ears! And On my bed too!" Snapped a voice behind Valgaav. "Oi, move it."   
  
Valgaav stepped aside letting Phibrizzo through whilst Sherra giggled still.   
  
"You shouldn't laugh, you should respect your fellow mazoku." Phibrizzo chided her wagging his finger. "Excuse me." He darted out the room and closed the door, letting a few childish giggles out before coming back in. "Ahem... he's in a bad way this time, hm?" The innocent looking Dark Lord turned to the mazoku who was poking the blanket and giggling at it. "Drunk again?"  
  
"No thanks... I think I had too much today. I'm already.. in... in.... infantile." Xelloss said brightly, leaping off the bed.   
  
"Intoxicated." Phibrizzo said, folding his arms. "You're drunk."  
  
"You are?"  
  
"No, you are."   
  
"You are?! You don't look old enough...."   
  
Phibrizzo turned to glare at Valgaav and Sherra stifling giggles behind him.   
  
"... Lets try something else. What's your name?"   
  
"Depends!"   
  
"Expected A 'sore wa himitsu desu.'" Sherra whispered to Valgaav, who nodded in reply.   
  
"A name is what people call me by. So... Either 'Xelloss', or 'Xellos', or 'Zerosu', or 'get down' or 'NO!' or 'Don't you dare press that big red button' or 'fruitcake' or 'purply' or 'HIM' or 'hey you!' or 'Fruit' or 'Get over here now' or 'namagomi' or...."  
  
"So, You are Xelloss." Phibrizzo tapped his foot. This was enough to try even Dynast's patience.   
  
"No, you're not! I am!"   
  
"Fine fine." Phibrizzo sighed. "I am Xelloss."  
  
"I am! Not Phribberizzero. Xelloss is Xelloss." He pointed to himself to empathsize the point.   
  
Well that worked... sorta.  
  
"Yes, you... er... Xelloss is Xelloss."   
  
"And you talk like Doflin." Xelloss pointed out, studying his boot. Surely laces should be tied at the bottom not the top?  
  
"I talk like Dolphin?"   
  
"No I don't!"   
  
"... Do you ever be quiet?"  
  
"It's funny you should mention that...." Xelloss scratched his head thoughtfully. "I was wondering something.... So if you want someone to be quiet and to stop talking, why hit them? Then they yell out and whine and make more noise.... so its probably better for them and everyone else if they just keep on talking and talking and talking and talking...."  
  
"Like someone not too far away." Phibrizzo was getting bored of this little game now, so he snapped his fingers and all 3 other mazoku found themselves in the library.   
  
"Book!" Xelloss exclaimed. "I was looking for this one.... A very long time ago... then I found it one day and read it. But not all of it. The thing is that the...."  
  
"No one cares!" Grau snapped, stepping out from behind a bookshelf and replacing the book. "You don't mess up the library I have spent so much time organising."   
  
Xelloss picked up Dynast's navy haired priest and plopped him on a shelf, adding a potted plant to the poor priests hair. Grau sat and glared back. Drunk and acting kinda childish, maybe, but still not worth risking picking a fight with, Grau had to stay put rather than fight with Xelloss.  
  
"We're going to have fun today..." Sherra grumbled.  
  
"Guess what everyone?" A new voice entered the room. It was Gaav's priest Raltark.   
  
"What?" Valgaav asked flatly.   
  
Raltark tutted and walked out of the room, returning a few seconds later to ask with more enthusiasm.   
  
"Guess what everyone?!"   
  
"What?" Sherra and Valgaav asked simultaneously.  
  
"See, it's not so hard is it people?" Raltark said grinning. "Well, you'll never guess who's back and in a rampage."   
  
"Go on..." Valgaav said.   
  
"Zelas is in one heck of a mood. Even Gaav-sama is avoiding her...."  
  
"... Because someone drank from her stash!" Sherra finished off for the red haired priest who nodded.   
  
Xelloss paled visably.   
  
"Who'd do that?!"   
  
"You." The group's verdict was undisputed.   
  
"After all... What did you only drink today?" Sherra asked.   
  
"The black Gaav wine gave .... oh my lord...."   
  
"Is going to kill you." Valgaav finished off for him as Xelloss zipped off to bed. A monster might appear in there everytime he did, but it was probably safer than staying out and about.   
  
"So, who actually LIKES him?" Raltark asked.   
  
No one answered.   
  
"And What was Zelas really annoyed about?" Valgaav asked.   
  
"Eh, she left her fur coat behind." Raltark replied with a shrug. "But we'll have some peace and quiet today."   
  
And they did! Someone was too scared to leave their broken bed.   
  
***  
Like it? Please review ^^ its a little odd and random idea that just cropped uo O.o Oh well ^^ 


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